Anybody like the Ocean's movies?

[deelaundry]

The Ocean's movies are a veritable playground of the HoYay.  Rusty and Danny have clearly being doin' it for years, and Linus wants to get in on the action too.  Way back in July '06, I was thinking about Ocean's 13, and thought who better to join the HoYayness than Matt Damon's best bud (and partner in slash-provoking) Ben Affleck.

I never did finish this into a proper fic, but thought maybe one or two of you might be amused at the snippet.

Dean (Ben Affleck) is an old family friend of Linus's.  Dean and Linus have known each other almost their enitre lives (their fathers are good friends) but are not particularly close.  Kind of a bickering cousin relationship.

Dean runs into Linus one day as he and the Ocean's crew are planning their latest gig.  Dean ingratiates himself to Danny (Danny knows Dean's father, naturally) and gets into the crew.

In this scene, Rusty, Linus, Dean (Ben Affleck), Virgil, Turk, and Livingston are in a seemingly abandoned building, spying on the restaurant across the street.  Tess is having lunch with their mark.  Dean is about to go across the street and start an argument with Tess, setting up backstory for her and allowing Danny to step in, break up the argument, and get in good with the target as well.

Dean: We have to change the plan.

Linus: What?

Dean: *pointing* That waiter is my ex-husband.

Rusty: You’re gay?

Linus: *surprised* You didn’t know that? *looks at each of the others in turn*

Rusty:  No.

Virgil:  No.

Livingston:  No. 
Turk:  No.

Dean smirks. All think.  Linus tosses out random ideas that are mostly ignored.

 

Dean: *gestures at Virgil* What about we keep the plan the same but have this kid do the role? He kind of looks like me.

Linus: His name is Virgil, and he doesn’t really look like you.

Dean: Virgil? That’s an unusual name. Where have I heard that before? Wait a minute. Are you Virgil Molloy?

Virgil: *warily* Yeah?

Dean: You son-of-a-bitch, you ruined my birthday.

Virgil and Linus (together): What?

Dean: My third birthday party – your mother’s water broke right before the cake. It was chocolate with chocolate cowboy boots on top of it, and I never got to eat any of it. Didn’t even get my presents until the next day.

Virgil: Well, actually Turk is older so you should probably blame him.

Linus: Dean, I was never sure you could play a woman’s jealous lover, anyway.

Dean: Are you saying I can’t pass for straight? How can you say that? Everyone in this room thought I was straight. Even your gay friend thought I was straight. *Pointing*

Linus:  Rusty’s not gay.

Dean: *shocked, turns to Rusty* Really? With that style?

Virgil: We have to change the plan!

 

Linus continues throwing out random ideas. Virgil & Turk are arguing with him.  Rusty is staring intently at the restaurant, eyes moving back and forth, thinking.

Dean:  *to Rusty in an aside* So you’re really straight?

Rusty: *matter-of-factly* Yep.

Dean: Not even bi?

Rusty: Nope.

Dean: Ignore the message I left for you at the hotel, then.

Rusty: Check. *stands up; says louder, to everyone* Here’s what we’re going to do…