An ode to springtime

"I woke up gay" is a standard trope I've always dismissed as unbelievable. But this morning when I woke up, I found my life view had changed just as abruptly.

My thought was this: The anus, when you think about it, is really, really gross. Unattractive, usually surrounded by hair, and oh yeah, feces comes out of there. Bacteria-filled garbage that the body is rejecting. So who in their right mind would want to put their fingers, genitalia, or--dear Lord--their tongue near the anus? Doesn't make sense, not sexy, and I can't believe I've been reading about it for so long.

And these characters that I've obsessed over, they're jerks. Why didn't I see this before? Well, House and McKay are meant to be jerks, that's the basis of their characters, but Wilson's a jerk, too. And Sheppard! Sure he's outwardly charming, but he won't talk about his feelings, he has a clear commitment problem, and he kills people without remorse. Jerk.

This negativity is what's been bringing me down for the past two years, and I say, no more. I'm going to turn my mind to things that are positive, caring, and uplifting. With that, I bring you this poem:

( Water Triumphantly Flowing )